Monday, January 31, 2011

Claire 2.0, Pt 1

There's a relatively new sport known as Mixed Martial Arts (MMA), that Michael and I enjoy. One MMA organization in particular is called Ultimate Fighting Championships (UFC). One of their commentators has a catch phrase he uses so often it's become a drinking game in some circles. As fighters stare each other down from their respective corners, the referee claps his hands together and shouts out "FIGHT!" The bell rings, and commentator Mike Goldberg's voice booms out:

"And heeere we GO!"

That's what I imagine in my mind as I start looking into permacooking. In other words, I have no idea what is going to happen. It might end in a healthier me, full of wisdom and sage advice to share about how you too can grow, harvest and pound your own heirloom grains like quinoa, amaranth or spelt into scrumptious breads as healthy and ecologically sustainable as they are tasty and nutritious. Or it might end in tears and bald patches from me pulling my own hair out by the handful. I'm aiming for something along the midpoint of the spectrum of extremes.

So what is permacooking, you may ask? Put simply, it's applying the three permaculture ethics (Care of earth, care of people and limiting consumption/sharing resources ) to how your food gets to your body. Though these ethics are simple, they do require a bit of learning to put into practice when it comes to food prep. There is quite a learning curve when you've been raised on McCorporate food and opening cans I can tell you!

To help other newbies on the road to being permacooking gourmets, I thought I'd share the journey! So here they are, step-by-step instructions on how to get away from the corporate world of ultra-processed, cruelty centered foods of negligible nutrition into the wonderful world of tasty, nutritious and sustainable permacooking!

Step 1: Decide to document with photos. Dig old, stale makeup out of closet and apply due to deceased Steel Magnolia mother's voice ringing in ears about how "every lady needs a little bit of color!"
Step 2: Lock self in bathroom to spare husband sounds of huffing an puffing as attempt to push earrings through piercings long ago closed from lack of adornment becomes increasingly annoying.

Step 3: Come to sudden realization as a farmer you haven't worn makeup in years. Remove makeup immediately.

Step 4: Come to second sudden realization (after about three hours) that "just a quick look on the net about DIY quinoa flour" has now become unbearably tedious. 

So, after all those steps I've come to the following conclusions.
  1. It's just food. 
  2. If no one likes it, I don't have to make it again.
  3. Bad food = good compost, so there's nothing to lose
So folks, stay tuned for the next exciting installment of Claire 2.0!